


Christmas for Everyone

by Lexie_Squirrel



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Blood, Canon-Typical Violence, Christmas, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2019-12-30
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:48:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21921688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lexie_Squirrel/pseuds/Lexie_Squirrel
Summary: Tonight was the night when a miracle could happen - even the Bat and Clown Prince could celebrate Christmas together.
Relationships: Batman/Joker
Comments: 2
Kudos: 37





	Christmas for Everyone

**Author's Note:**

> It's my old fic written in January 2015. I would probably write it differently now, but okay. It's a little bit more fluffy and OOC than I wanted it, but come on, it's Christmas!
> 
> Thanks madamealucard for beta-reading!

When Gotham becomes shrouded in snow and Christmas approaches, a false sense of security takes over. Multi-colored lights flicker everywhere, there is a big Christmas tree on the main square, carefree children having snowball fights and their parents preparing gifts for them. During such holidays, you might think that you live not in Gotham, but in an ordinary American city, where nothing ever happens. It seems that you can safely go Christmas shopping or ice-skating or even spend time with your beloved without the fear that all this will collapse at the hands of another madman or criminal gang. There is a timid hope that if you believe it enough, then Christmas will go as it should - with the rustling of paper as presents are unwrapped, the entrancing smell of roasted turkey and the soft tinkle of Christmas decorations. But still, in my memory, Christmas has never passed quietly, like it does for most families. The holidays were like a challenge for all the perverted and cruel minds of Gotham.

Of course, the most insane resident of Gotham City couldn't stay away. Even if the Joker was locked up in the asylum, he always found a way to escape on Christmas Eve and arrange a nightmarish surprise for everyone. But this time, I was determined to catch the clown before he could do anything bad. So I slipped out of hiding before nightfall - in the lilac twilight.

Finding the Joker in a noisy, snowy city was not so simple. But this time I got lucky. I found the clown on one of the flat roofs, not far from the main square, where festive music was being played and people were having fun around the Christmas tree. The Joker whirled under the falling snowflakes in some strange slow dance, arms outstretched and his eyes closed. In that moment, he appeared to me as nothing more than an eccentric and innocent clown, but I could not forget the blood on his hands from the many people he'd harmed.

Although I was quiet as I stood on the roof with him, the Joker stopped and opened his eyes. His lips outstretched into a happy smile.

"You came!" he exclaimed. "I've been waiting for you, Bats!"

If I delayed for even a second, I would once again have to become the Joker's partner in our eternal deadly dance on the edge of the abyss. And this is what I wanted the least.

"Enough, Joker," I said with a heavy tone. "I don't intend to play your games today. All I want to do is get you back to Arkham."

"How boring you are!" the Joker grimaced. "I want to play a little more! Come on, it's Christmas Eve!"

When I slowly moved towards him, the clown jumped back and burst out laughing.

"I like playing with you, Batman! Especially in catch-up!"

And then he darted towards me and slapped my shoulder, slipping under my arm and nimbly making a couple of circles around me, beaming with joy. I grabbed him by the lapel of his frock coat and pulled him closer to me.

"So, Joker," I said. "Let me clarify. I know that you are up to something, and you know that I will stop you from doing whatever it is. So let's save both of us the time and energy - and skip to the part where you're back in Arkham."

The Joker pouted.

"I don't want to go there. The asylum is always so dull and boring at Christmas. I want to stay here!"

Sometimes he looked like a capricious child... with deadly toys. For instance, the dirty flower on his frock coat that squirted right into my eyes. I let go of the Joker, reflexively raising a hand to my face, but then I realized that it was just cold water.

The Joker ran to the side, only laughing once he was out of reach.

"You should have seen your face!..."

But then he became serious.

"You know, Bats. You're wrong. This time I'm not up to anything. I mean... I thought I would come up with something along the way from the asylum. But nothing funny came to mind. Well... funny enough to spend my time on it. So I decided to just give myself a rest. After all, Christmas is for everyone!"

"Not for you," I smirked, raising the corner of my mouth.

The Joker's face changed as he spoke with an unexpected bitterness:

"How am I different from the rest?"

The clown never spoke seriously about himself and he was almost proud of his sick, crazy mind, despising all the good people and labelling them as boring. Therefore, such a revelation coming from the Clown Prince sparked my curiosity, but I couldn't find the right words and hid behind Batman’s impregnable mask.

"I'm afraid there’s a whole list of very unpleasant differences," I answered and added indulgently. "Besides, as you know, only good kids get presents for Christmas."

The Joker turned away from me, arms crossed over his chest. Looking down from the roof, into the square illuminated by lamp posts and the lights on the Christmas tree, he said:

"Do I ask that much? Just to be free on Christmas. Like all the normal people."

But I couldn't let him run his long fingers under my armor to arouse my sympathy. He shouldn't have even dared to count on it.

"You are not like them. And you never will be," I answered harshly. "Don't think for a second that I believe you. If I leave you here alone, it will end in mass murder. As it always does."

"You don't believe me at all..." the Joker said wearily.

"Why would I believe you?" I answered. "You have proven to me time and time again that you cannot be trusted. And that you will never reform. Why should I believe that suddenly today, an insight has come upon you and you've just decided, as you put it, to rest a bit? I fear that our concepts of entertainment are very different from each other."

The Joker quickly looked back over his shoulder. And then he stepped down from the roof.

I choked a cry in my throat and rushed to the edge, but below lay only the snowy busy streets. Then there was a quiet laugh behind me.

Damn that circus boy!

Turning around, I scanned the nearest roofs with my eyes. Nothing.

The laughter repeated, this time it sounded much livelier and more mischievous than before.

"You know," I said loudly, "I just wanted to take you to the asylum, but now I think that a little whipping won't hurt you."

A flurry of snow slid down from somewhere above me. I raised my head and saw that the Joker sat cross-legged on the crest of the neighbor roof. When he realized that I had noticed him, he happily clapped his hands and then somersaulted over his head and disappeared.

"Stop this show NOW!" I barked.

Then it occurred to me that the Joker, with all his childlike tricks, could just be lulling my attention in the hopes of inflicting a serious blow when I least expected it. He might just grab a gun and pull the trigger - and the gun could be a big red flag with the word 'Bang!' or it could be something worse... Just in case, I took a batarang and squeezed it in my gloved fingers.

"Show yourself immediately! This isn't funny!"

Laughter to my left.

"But it is, Batsy! It is!"

Like violet lightning, he rushed along the neighboring roof and disappeared somewhere behind the chimney. Just because he decided to have fun at Christmas, didn't mean I had to participate. But I could not leave him to roam free on the rooftops, so I had to catch the clown at all costs. The Joker is not the only threat to Gotham - especially today, on Christmas Eve, I expect there will be other, extremely unpleasant happenings. I was too busy to dance on the roofs with my mortal enemy. This needed to be done quickly.

I jumped to another roof and found myself in a snowy niche, surrounded on four sides by skates of roofs. The clown was not visible, but it became clear to me suddenly and I realized that he still had a plan. Like myself, he had decided to begin by eliminating his main threat before proceeding with his other tasks. The snow had already stopped falling and I suddenly felt the tension - the Joker had to strike right now.

I turned around in time and managed to see from the corner of my eye that something was flying right at me. I threw the batarang almost at random, focusing on the purple figure that suddenly appeared in my field of vision.

It wasn't a scream. Rather a surprised exhale.

And I lowered my eyes and realized that an innocent lump of snow had crashed into my armor.

I looked up and saw that the Joker was standing still, and darkness was rapidly growing in his eyes. He slowly pulled the batarang from his shoulder and held it in his hand, watching how the red blood dripped from black metal, and then he dropped it in the snow.

"You don't know how to play snowballs at all," said the Joker without a trace of a smile on his face. He turned around and disappeared.

"I'm sorry, Joker!" I wanted to shout, but I forced myself to shut up and remember that instead of a snowball, it could have been a sharpened playing card. The Joker was the only one to blame for my instant reaction. He was also lucky that the batarang didn't hit him in the throat. As for the shoulder... the shoulder will heal, even if it will cause him trouble for the next few days.

I could have rushed after him, but I didn't.

I could follow the trail of scarlet drops in the snow, but I didn't move.

If the Joker wants a normal Christmas so badly, I can give him such a gift. But if the clown decides to turn everything upside down and arrange a horribly deadly prank, it will be my own mistake - for which he will pay.

I forced myself to forget about the Joker, who now roamed the festive streets, free to do whatever he wants. I hoped that a bleeding wound would deter him against making any rash decisions. Well, tomorrow I'd find him and return him to Arkham anyway. Today, I have enough on my plate. It was becoming darker, which meant it was time for the bat to hunt.

However, this would not be my last meeting with the Joker for the night. After a few short fights with criminal scum that I brought straight to the police station, a fierce fight with some larger opponents and an unpleasant encounter with the Calendar Man, I allowed myself a short respite. Leaving the Batmobile in a dark alley, I went to the old park, where my mother used to take me on Christmas. There were no walkers or casual passers-by anymore, after Poison Ivy settled here last fall, infecting the trees and plants with her new toxin. After Ivy was returned to the asylum with my help, the park was closed. The poison in the leaves and wood gradually faded away and I predict that it should be completely depleted by the summer.

In the meantime, I could afford a short walk on snow-covered paths under the bare trees. Thankfully, I'd developed an immunity to Ivy's toxin the autumn before. But I didn't rest for long, because almost immediately I found traces of someone else's shoes in the snow. After a concise ban on walking the park grounds and an explanation given by city hall and the police, only a suicidal person or a madman would walk into this poisonous park. Or maybe the one man I knew who was not affected by almost all known poisons and toxins.

I quickened my pace.

I found him on the bench, tired, with drooping shoulders.

"Ah... it's you again," he answered without enthusiasm. "Have you been looking for me or is it just an accident?"

"An accident," I said and walked closer. "How's your arm?"

"Arm? Oh, you're talking about this..." the Joker looked unusually absent-minded. "It hurts, thanks."

I sighed.

"Would you believe me if I said that it was not intentional?"

"You know... I don't care," the Joker answered thoughtfully, "You could even take my head off, it makes no difference to me."

"May I sit next to you?" I asked quietly.

He smiled at the corner of his mouth and nodded. I cleared the snow from the bench and sat next to him, but not so close that it would make either of us uncomfortable.

"What's wrong with you today?" I finally asked. "You don't look like yourself."

"I don’t know, just melancholy... You see, I don’t always want to have fun around the clock."

"This is news to me."

We sat in silence for a while, but then the Joker moved his red lips and said:

"It happens to me... sometimes. Everything around me seems to become black, although usually everything is like a rainbow-colored firework with a musical cacophony. I start to remember things... that I shouldn't have to remember. Because they are not my memories. They belong to another man."

He laughed shortly.

"At such moments, a good shrink wouldn't hurt! Oh, Bats..." he sighed. "You have no idea what's going on in my head sometimes. I'm much crazier than you think. Usually it amuses me, but not now," and then he abruptly switched to another topic, reviving slightly. "You never had - I know you didn't, Mr. All-Seriousness, but anyway - you never had a feeling like when you don't feel like having fun, but you know you have to? Because it's how you should be, because people expect it from you. And you slap a smile on your face and force yourself to have fun. And then it gets easier, and you really have fun? It happens to me all the time. I force myself to smile and start to do bad things. And then I get a taste, and it gives me pleasure again."

On and below his shoulder is a dark, damp gleaming spot and there is dried blood on his left glove from holding the wound I had inflicted. I just now noticed that he was shivering. He'd probably frozen up while sitting here in a dark abandoned park, all alone, waiting for Christmas night. Most of the time I don't realize that he is also a man... just a man and not a supernatural monster manifested from a scary dream. Madness gives him strength, but it is also his greatest weakness. Only that weakness is rarely noticed by people. And probably, least of all by me...

Gently, fearing to hurt his wounded arm, I drew him to me, throwing the edge of my cape over him. The Joker didn't resist... didn't even make a sound. Just let out a quiet sigh.

A burning wave rose from the very depths of my soul, a mixture of guilt, pity and inexplicable tenderness for this green-haired clown. A wave so strong that it could demolish all the bastions I'd rebuilt over so many years, and allow me to pour out what I had been hiding for so long from everyone around me and myself in particular.

"Christmas is coming soon," I said, and in the soundlessness that came, I heard a white hat of snow fall from a branch somewhere. "You sure you want to spend it here?"

The Joker didn't answer, but expected me to continue.

"If you want, we can go up to the roof and look at the Christmas lights. We'll spend this time together," and I added hastily. "As an exception, of course."

Then softer:

"I think you need it now."

I didn't tell him that I also needed a Christmas like that. Tonight was the night when a miracle could happen - even the Bat and Clown Prince could celebrate Christmas together.

The Joker squinted at me cunningly, and then grunted:

"How easy it is to manipulate you, Batsy. But I was lying the whole time. I'll always lie to you."

"Of course you're lying," I thought with a smirk. "You're lying right now, because you're desperately ashamed of your revelations and you want to take back what you said. But I'll pretend that I believe you."

"You said Christmas wasn't for me," the clown said with a sudden stubborness.

"You might not believe it, but it's not for me either," I remarked. "It’s not for people like you or me. It's for happy families, lovers and little children."

"I still think that Christmas is for everyone," the Joker said quietly, and then squinted suspiciously. "Why are you being so nice with me today, eh, Bats? You accuse me of not looking like myself, but you are not yourself either."

"Maybe it's the holiday?"

"What, Ebenezer Scrooge... I mean, Batman decided to warm up before Christmas and congratulate each petty criminal with the Spirit of Christmas?" the Joker laughs. "I can hardly imagine such a thing!"

"I hope you understand that you are not just another criminal?" I asked with restraint.

"Of course! I'm exceptional!" the clown answered smugly. "One of a kind! The most ingenious, the most dangerous, the most..."

"...the most boastful," I smirked and rose from the bench. "Come on. It’s midnight soon, and then Christmas Eve will end..."

"And the Batmobile will turn into a pumpkin!" the Joker declared, jumping to his feet.

"It's your head that will turn into a pumpkin," I grumbled, but then the unexpected happened.

The Joker burst out laughing and slapped my shoulder with a healthy hand, rushing away and lifting whirlwinds of snow with his feet.

"Catch me, Batty Boy!"

No, that was precisely what I wasn't expecting. But suddenly, I rushed after him... no longer restraining my laughter. I ran through the old park in which I once played with my mother, I ran, as I once did in my forgotten childhood, letting all the hardships and torments of the Caped Crusader of Gotham City fall away. It was Christmas Eve again, it was snowing again, and once again I was next to the person whom I...

"Attention! Don't use your bat-thingies!" the Joker shouted and threw a snowball at me before fleeing.

He missed and laughed.

If only someone could see us!

The Joker looked so happy as he ran away from me, arms outstretched, like an airplane. I ran after him, feeling the same euphoria, followed by a black cloak strewn with scattered snowflakes. I didn't know what I would do when I caught up with him. I'd probably topple him into the snow and hold my instinctive desire to slam my fist into that smiling face, and then...

But I didn't take one thing into account. The Joker ran very fast. It wasn't long before we found ourselves outside the old park, back on the streets of Gotham, where we were thrust back into our usual selfs and where the echo of my happy childhood was hidden. The clown ran back a few steps and turned to me.

"Ha, you wimp!"

He looked at me defiantly, but I saw uncertainty in him. The Joker was afraid that our short truce was over and that I would make him collapse in the snow with one blow, before snapping the black metal handcuffs on his wrists.

"Do you still want to celebrate Christmas with me?" I asked quietly.

And before we knew it we were on the roofs. Sometimes the Joker deftly jumped over the dips below, sometimes I had to grab him and fly from roof to roof with him. On his white face was genuine enthusiasm and in my soul, a gentle warmth.

Down below are festive streets. And here above - just us two. And this is our secret. A secret from our past, a secret from our future. Just us, here and now.

The Joker no longer felt the cold. He smiled and his green eyes burned with passion. We stood on the roof opposite each other, as Christmas music played nearby. Therefore, when the Joker extended his white gloved hand towards me, I had no question or objection.

"Shall we dance?" the Joker giggled.

He laughed at his own joke.

But it was not a joke.

Batman and the Joker, the vigilante and the murderer, dancing slowly on the roof under the falling snowflakes. We looked into each other's eyes and didn't see hatred. We held onto each other without trying to cause any harm. We were silent, no need to shout threats. I gently hugged his waist without showering him with cruel blows. And the Joker laughed quietly, instead of his usual mad cackle.

The craziest Christmas of my life.

It was like a shaky line between a dream and reality, where you allow yourself to do whatever you like, without the fear of consequences and being afraid of only one thing - frightening away the illusion.

I tilted my head slightly to finally catch those laughing lips and at that very moment the dream broke. The Joker stepped back sharply, freed from my hands while dark lights flashed in his eyes.

"Christmas tree, in the main square," he said abruptly. "Explodes at midnight. The Christmas decorations will be like shrapnel. You have less than ten minutes."

Just like a dream, when you suddenly wake up, you may not immediately come to your senses.

"Joker..." I gasped.

He took a few steps back, lifting his chin stubbornly. Unclear feelings splashed in those black dilated pupils.

"Hurry up, otherwise someone's Christmas will be their last," he said, his throat hoarse.

"Joker!"

And to think, for a few moments, I wanted to kiss him. I was happy - because of him.

"Run, stupid!" shouted the Joker. "Otherwise, everyone will die! That's not what you want, is it?"

I knew that I needed to run, that the clown was not joking, but I still spent those precious moments with him. I jumped towards him, pushed him with all my strength into the snow and hung over him, lifting him by the lapels of his purple coat as I hissed:

"Why, Joker? Why did you do this?"

"Because I wanted to do it!" Joker spat the words in my face. "Happy? Go! Then you can come back and kiss me if that's what you want!"

One blow from my fist and the Joker is forced to cover his bleeding lips with his palm, sucking in an intake of air through his teeth with a whistling noise.

"You better not be here when I get back," I said, barely restraining my rage. "Because then I will kill you."

The Joker spat blood in the snow and laughed, exposing his red-smeared teeth.

"You won't kill me. Never killed and never will!"

I threw myself from the roof, shooting my grappling hook into the air.

"Merry Christmas, Bats!"

The desperate and dreary laugh of the Joker followed me. I had less than ten minutes to defuse a bomb planted by a madman and I needed to focus on that alone, but I could not get the clown out of my head.

He set a deadly trap in the Christmas tree before he met me in the park. To be more precise - he'd set the trap after he received an undeserved batarang in the shoulder. Could the Joker simply have forgotten about what he had prepared and not warned me in advance about what he'd done in anger? Did he remember this only a moment before our kiss and refuse it to give me a chance to correct his own mistake? Did he refuse it because he realized that he had no right to the kiss?...

Why am I even seeking excuses for this crazy clown?

The truth is much simpler and much more painful.

The Joker caught me, appealed to my softer nature and turned my lonely cold Christmas into a warm holiday with a rooftop dance. And the whole time he cherished the idea of what kind of surprise he would give me. And in that moment, when I was ready to share with him the kiss which I needed so desperately that it made him smirk, he laid his cards out on the table.

I hate him so much!...

Yet I was ready to kiss him, despite all the horrors that he had committed in the past and would commit in the future.

I flew through the snow and darkness, through hatred and love, not yet knowing that the bomb would be defused in time, that no one would suffer and that the crazy clown would wait for me at my batmobile with outstretched hands - "Guilty!"

Not knowing that I would crash him into the car, fasten his hands behind his back and silently, not succumbing to provocations, take him to Arkham.

And there, already in the cold hands of doctors and guards, he'd suddenly burst forward, smeared bloodied lips on my compressed mouth and whisper: "Until next Christmas, Batsy."

And I will never admit to neither God nor the Devil that I will look forward to next Christmas with a growing impatience, like a child who dreams of unwrapping their gift. Next time I won’t let the clown play with me, I’ll finish our dance and leave my kiss on those red lips.

It will be Christmas Eve again, it will snow again, and once again I will be next to the person whom I... love...

In the meantime...

Through the snow and darkness.

Through hatred and love.


End file.
